I am 33. I just turned 33 a few days ago. I am not gonna lie… I am kinda freaking out you are not around. I am not sure at all if I already met you. I am not dating anyone. There are a few guys that keep texting me but neither of them seem to really want anything with me… or at least not that I know of…
Are you one of them? Do I know you? Are we friends?
I don’t know why or how but several people… mostly men…have added me on Facebook and tell me that I am beautiful and blah blah blah… maybe they want me to help them get a green card or they want me to give them money. Don’t worry! I am not engaging with any of them!
So… 2017 is almost here… a few days from here! Wow! Crazy huh? I still think 1997 was 10 years ago!
And as you will know… every year I get this attitude of new year, new me! It only lasts a few days! It also happens at the ending of every month tho! Don’t panic! I will not make you have that attitude with me. Just listen to me and act supportive! It will go away! 😉😂
This time tho… I am not setting any goals like I usually do. This year I will have this attitude I am telling you about but I will try my best to keep it going!
Mainly cuz I am exhausted. I am sooooo tired of the same thing. I heard on TV this saying “The good thing about hitting rock bottom is that there is only one way out. UP!”
This is kinda where I am. You see? I have been waiting for you to appear in my life for a while now. I have been praying for you like I have never prayed before. I have been working on myself so that you will have NO DOUBT when we meet!
I keep thinking that I am closer to you or closer to meet you every time I start falling for someone. I don’t fall for people super fast… I take my sweet time… as you will probably know… I don’t just fall for the average dude and I usually give it my all.
Where in the heck are you tho SERIOUSLY?!?
Am I that impossible to be with that you just won’t ask me out? Am I that terribly looking that it makes you double guess?
Do you think that I will not fall for you and that’s why you don’t seem to ask me out? Am I not strong enough in my walk for you? Are these blogs making you scared?
This time, my dear future husband, I making things a bit harder for you. A little pay back for making me wait this long!!! Just kidding. I just want to make sure I am not opening my heart to just anyone anymore.
I am soooooo used to it… it happens way too often.
You see? I am just like any other girl… I fall for the texting or the nice words.
The inside jokes and stuff…
I just keep thinking is you and then my bubble gets bursted by a guy who is not sure about me… a guy that wants nothing to do with me… a guy that likes my attention but doesn’t want my love.
I keep thinking it might be YOU!!!
This time or this coming year… I am gonna move differently. I am gonna move freely. I am gonna be the normal Esli… the brutally honest, the loving and fun BUT you will have to really LET ME KNOW IS YOU… I will not open my bruised and sore little heart to anyone until I know it’s you!
Gosh!! I can’t wait to meet you!!!
I can’t wait to be your helper!!!
I can’t wait to give you all this love I have!!!
I can’t wait to be yours!!! AND ONLY YOURS!!!!
I can’t wait to do ministry with you!
I can’t wait to be the wife you have always prayed for!
I can’t wait to be your #1 fan!!
I can’t wait to be your best encourager!!!
I can’t wait to kiss your entire face!!!
I just can’t wait!
And waiting sometimes hurts sooooo much!!!
A Pastor (Adam Stadtmiller) a few days ago had a word for me he said:
“The Lord wants me to tell you that you don’t need a husband. You don’t need him BUT you deserve one! Stop acting like you need him! You are freaking amazing!”
God is right! I mean I know He is God so He is ALWAYS right!
I don’t need you right now! I am doing ministry very well without you!
And one day I will get what I deserve!
Your future wifey
I can’t wait to have your last name.